The most important factor is that you find an adoption-competent professional: someone who has lived experience and training in being with people who are affected by adoption.
Counselor, consultant, or coach?
What is the difference between Counselor, Consultant or Coach?
It can be hard to know what kind of help works best for you, your children, or your family. Each type of support offers different benefits, and together they give people and families in the adoption constellation a more complete safety net. In fact, you can use more than one at a time. Some people use coaching alongside therapy, which can enhance your path forward. Others use consulting and coaching together, which can be especially helpful while you are adopting a child.
Compare your options
Three kinds of support, side by side
Adoption Coach
Looks to the future
Does not diagnose
Works alongside you
Does not give advice
Co-creates a plan for what you want to work on and where you want to go
Builds your capabilities
The right call when
You need someone to understand your unique situation and help you create a way forward.
Where to find one
Adoption Consultant
Looks at the present to see what can be improved
Assesses your situation based on their expertise
Gives you ideas and a walk-through of the steps to reach your goal
The right call when
You want someone to guide you through the adoption process and give you pointers along the way.
Where to find one
There is no central directory. Look for consultants within adoption agencies and adoption organizations.
Adoption Therapist or Counselor
Looks to the past in order to heal
Provides licensed treatment that works from a diagnosis to reduce symptoms
Uses various psychological frameworks with clients (may include coaching)
The right call when
You have been struggling with past trauma that is affecting your ability to function at your best.
Where to find one
Questions and answers
Adoption competence, explained
What does "adoption competent" actually mean?
You may see this term as you search for a professional to support you. At its best, "adoption competent" means that professionals not only appreciate the complexities of adoption but have also developed a heightened awareness of how adoption plays a role in the lives of the people they serve.
What does a certified Adoption Attuned coach actually do?
Professionals who hold the Adoption Attuned Coaching® certification go deeper. They have lived experience, they understand the layers of adoption, and they practice the TriSpective Approach: all three members of the triad (the adopted person, the birth/first parent, and the adoptive parent) are respected and held in the coach's mind as they work with you.
Ultimately, you are in the driver's seat. In keeping with coaching ethics, we do not hand out advice. If you would like us to share our experience rather than guide you with questions, we say clearly that we are putting on a consultant's hat. Even then, it is all suggestion, yours to take or leave.
How to choose
Which kind of support fits where you are?
Need detailed instruction on next steps?
A consultant may be a good fit. For example: do you feel lost among all the steps and requirements involved in adopting a child?
Is past experience holding you back?
A therapist or counselor is a great possibility. For example: are you unable to stop thinking about what happened to you, or do unresolved emotions keep you from functioning?
Want to move forward but feel stuck?
A coach is your best bet. For example: how do you get out of this rut and move forward in a new way?
Need support?
An Adoption Attuned coach is an excellent resource. An Adoption Attuned coach is an excellent resource. For example: Is your parenting no longer meeting your adopted child’s needs, and you want to strategize a way forward with a new approach?
Want to consider your choices?
An Adoption Attuned coach can support you. For example: are you seeking a relationship with your biological family and want to explore what that could mean?
Not sure which you need? Ask us. We will tell you honestly.
Request a free consultation with one of our Adoption Attuned coaches.
Or call us at 1-800-653-9445