Lesson 3 Pretest–Test Your “AQ”

1. Expectations, beliefs, and presuppositions have little influence on how people understand adoption.

2. Parents can influence their child’s genes and the way they are expressed.

3. Truth telling is integral to parents and children sustaining a loving, trusting, life-long relationship.

4. Conversation seeds can facilitate openness and dialog between parent and child.

5. Relinquishment and separation from the birth mother and family is a trauma characterized by fracture.

6. There is no trauma resulting from being adopted into a family.

7. When an adopted baby is overly calm and undemanding, it shows that they have adjusted well into their new family.

8. Families who adopt sibling groups must help the children manage their pre-existing sibling dynamics so they can learn to trust the adoptive parents to care for them.

9. Parents who adopt transracially face some additional responsibilities as compared to those who adopt children of the same race.

10. Adoptive parents do not need to worry about activating their child’s fear of rejection and abandonment when disciplining their child.

11. A child adopted at an older age may remember difficult or frightening circumstances associated with holiday celebrations and this might show up in their behavior.

12. An adopted child will always delight in celebrating their birthday.

13. As they grow and develop a deeper comprehension of how adoption changed their lives, adoptees’ feelings about and interest in celebrating their Arrival Day will evolve.

14. Adoptive parents should avoid talking about difficult issues so they avoid upsetting their child.

15. It is appropriate for adoptive parents to expect their child to be 100% loyal to them.

16. When talking about an adopted child’s personal information, the distinction between privacy and secrecy is irrelevant.

17. There are some particular phrases and language that adoptive parents must commit to never speaking to their child.

18. All parents must follow ethical standards. Adoptive parents face some additional ethical obligations.

19. A need for felt safety may often cause an adopted child to create distance from others and protect themselves stem from their need for felt safety.

20. Adopted children and their parents benefit when they engage with other adoptive parents and children.

21. Feeling the need to prove that their adoptive family is as “real” as a bio family can sometimes lead parents to ignore the complexities that need to be addressed in adoptive families.

22. In addition to writing their wills, adoptive parents should compile a Continuity of Care Plan that addresses their adoption-related responsibilities.