Growing Intentional Families Together Blog
Read our blog to find out the latest on adoption.
Intentionality, Conflict Resolution and Prioritizing Relationships
All relationships experience conflict. Healthy relationships are characterized not by the absence of conflict, but by the effort expended in addressing conflict, repairing emotional injuries, rebuilding broken trust, and cultivating an ongoing commitment to one another. Pasting a happy face over unresolved conflict allows emotional wounds to fester and ultimately destroys both connection and trust. Equally damaging, are expectations that rely on the other person’s ability to read our minds, to intuitively know what we need and want. It takes courage to speak up and say, “You hurt me,” especially if we admit this not in the passion of anger but rather, with a clear head and a willingness to expose our vulnerability. Sharing this message requires courage and reveals an emotional investment in the relationship. Sharing the truth and hearing the truth requires both persons to be emotionally vulnerable.
Adoptee’s Birthdays Blend Laughter and Tears, Joy and Sadness
For many adopted children, birthdays can be overwhelming as it awakens powerful & conflicting emotions. Their birthday is inextricably linked with the primal loss of their first mother & extended biological family. I suspect that many kids do not even understand why they feel so conflicted on their birthday nor do they understand what might drive them to create chaos and turmoil in the midst of all the celebrations…Just as assuredly as a puff of breath extinguishes the candles on a birthday cake, adoption snuffed out one version of life for all of us and replaced it with the one which we have lived for several decades. Perhaps we will never know if this was “best.” At this point in time, it is simply what is and we have made peace with that fact even as we all understand the profound “cost” of that reality.
Successful Families Take Care & Build a Strong Core
The business of family is the care and protection of its members. We succeed or fail together. As Intentional Parents,...
The Burning Truth When Things Really Are on Fire
My husband had the admirable ability to remain calm in the face of upheaval and chaos. As a person strongly influenced...
The Flames of Adoptee Grief
Here in Florida, the Parkland community is reeling from the recent deaths by suicide of two student survivors of the...
Food for the Heart, Spirit, and Body
Last week's conversation about family traditions got me thinking about how traditions help create a thread of...
Family Traditions by Intention
Have you ever given thought to the small yet memorable traditions which generations of your family have repeated?...
And the Winner is … Our Family
We are in the midst of Award Season. Media is touting favorites and making predictions for the Oscars, Emmys, etc.....
Helping Hands, Helping Hearts
To ensure that kids get the lesson behind every choice we make, we must make the thoughts and choices visible to them and share our reasons for doing these things. Even if we feel silly or self-conscious, let’s choose to do it anyway. Imparting our values is too important to leave to chance or the wavering attention of children. Here are just a few examples:
Soundtracks Build Connection
Music evokes emotion in ways deeper than words. It unlocks memories reminding us of people, places, times, and events. This is why film producers spend small fortunes blending the perfect soundtrack for their works. Most of us compile music collections on our phones and can listen whenever we wish, to whatever we choose. We care about music and even consider certain special songs as “ours.” As Intentional Parents, music offers us an important avenue for strengthening connection with our kids.
